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14 Small Changes That Add Up To Big Results

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Now that the holidays are over, it’s time to get focused on the new year. Rather than creating a long list of resolutions (which can seem intimidating and unreachable), try to do something new each day. Small changes can add up to big results over time and are the key to creating lasting change.

Try one or all to reach your goal of a healthier you!

1. Calm the monkey mind.

Meditate today only for five minutes. Don’t worry … there is no WRONG way to meditate. You just have to do it. Need guidance? Check out the Omvana app.

2. Make your coffee green.

Try matcha tea to get your caffeine fix in the morning. It’s something I look forward every morning. It can create a calming ritual (and gets those biceps working as you whisk the tea into a froth).

3. Add a veggie to each meal.

We should be getting five to nine sevings of fruits and veggies a day. This isn’t an invitation to gorge on the bounty of winter citrus fruits, however! Limit your fruit intake to two servings a day to avoid spikes in blood sugar. If you’re already a veggie lover, try something new like kohlrabi, or a fennel basil smoothie to keep your taste buds guessing.

4. Ditch the gluten. At least for one day.

Notice if you have changes in your mood throughout the day or experience less bloating. With gluten intolerance on the rise, you may be causing inflammation to your body unknowingly. In my practice, patients have often told me they didn’t realize how bad they were feeling on their current diet until they removed certain food triggers. Waking up puffy, achy, and congested doesn’t have to be your norm!

5. Make your own nut milk.

It’s simple and easy. Also it’s much more delicious than store bought brands to use in your next cup of hot cocoa.

6. Schedule a playdate.

Invite yourself or a group of friends or family. Often we dread going to the gym and see it as work. But changing what we call “exercise” can have a profound effect on our actually doing it. Go ice skating or jump around on a trampoline. Not only will you increase your heart rate, but you’re guaranteed to bring out your inner child!

7. Make a new playlist.

Make a playlist that embodies where you see yourself going in 2014. You can even make one for each area of your life—financial, love, career, etc.

8. Write a letter to yourself.

Set your intentions for the year and then seal it closed. Don’t open until Dec 31, 2014. Give it to a trusted friend or lock it away from prying eyes. At the end of the year, it it amazing to see what we have actually accomplished just by putting the intention in black and white.

9. Turn off your phone.

Ideally for a day. Or maybe just an hour. That means no Facebook, email, Twitter, candy crush, Instagram or anything in between. Just BE. Often we unconsciously distract ourselves with mindless activity to avoid facing the truth of what is really going on in our lives. What happens when you just enjoy your own company or dinner with your partner and no one is checking their phone to fill in the the gaps? Magic.

10. Forgive.

Most of us have at least one person in our lives that we need to forgive if we are honest with ourselves. It doesn’t have to be a long drawn out, tissue filled process. Just acknowledging the discord in the relationship and forgiving yourself for the role you played can be enough. Let it go and move on.

11. Try acupuncture.

Based on traditional Chinese medicine, acupuncture can have a profound effects on your psyche and physical body. Using very tiny needles, it can change your body’s response to healing and allow the new you to emerge.

12. Plump your wrinkles naturally.

Drink water. Then drink some more water. Most of us are dehydrated and don’t even know it! More than 50% of our body is water so drink up. You should be drinking about half your body weight in ounces of water a day.

13. Get a tongue scraper.

Research has shown that many people’s health is held in their mouth. Have you looked at your tongue lately? Notice a white or green coating? Or maybe a groove down the center or a bright red tip? This may be a sign of imbalances in your body such as leaky gut syndrome or yeast overgrowth. Find a functional medicine practitioner in your area to determine if this is cause for concern.

14. Smile.

At a stranger. If they are a cute stranger, I recommend “smizing”! (Smiling with your eyes) Seriously though, this simple and free act can literally change your biochemistry and the other person. Smiling activates the reward centers in your brain for that instant endorphin rush.

At the end of the 14 days, how do you feel? Add to this list and let me know!

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How To Get A Whole Lot Of Sh*t Done In A Day

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I am a multi-tasker. Lately, we hear about how unhealthy it is to be chronically managing numerous—and often conflicting—demands on our attention. But with two careers, two children, two ex-husbands, two aging parents, a household to run and a large circle of friends, for me, multi-tasking is a necessary way of life. My friends often look at what I manage to accomplish and say, “I don’t know how you do it all.”

Well…here’s how:

1. Prioritize: Establish a hierarchy of needs.

We tend to heap everything we need to do into one big pile of tasks. Finding time to “do it all” may actually require redefining “all.” It’s important to identify a hierarchy of needs. What is truly essential? Be radically truthful. Unless it supports life itself, chances are it’s optional. Holding this perspective allows us to discern what comes first and what can wait, or even get bumped from the to-do list all together.

2. Compartmentalize: Be present in the moment.

Divide up your time and be fully present to the task at hand. This is a muscle that can be developed. When you’re working, really focus on work. When you’re parenting, be wholly present to your kids. I often imagine that I have various hats that I put on and take off.

I don’t allow myself to go to the park with my son when I’m wearing my “writing fedora.” Nor do I wear my “mommy cowboy hat” when I take a meeting. When you finally carve time for yourself, do it without guilt, even if you choose to do nothing at all. When we let ourselves off the hook for what we’re not getting done, it frees us up to celebrate what we are fully showing up for in each moment.

3. Time-out: Take a moment of stillness.

There are often moments during the day when I feel like my head might explode with the number of things I’m trying to handle at once. I can usually tell when it’s reached a critical point, because I lose the ability to finish a thought or form a complete sentence. Taking a self-imposed time-out is the perfect medicine for this.

Step away from all electronic devices and sit for five minutes in silence. Sit comfortably with your eyes closed and slow yourbreath. Pause at the top of each inhalation and at the bottom of each exhalation, creating a moment of stillness. Starting you day with this practice sets a baseline for inner peace which you can return to throughout the day.

4. Support: Ask for help.

Asking for help can make us feel vulnerable, and so we often bobble the request. And if you’re like me, the best way to get things done is to do them yourself. The flipside of my “Superwoman” card reads “Supermartyr.” In order to feel supported, we need to relinquish control.

Get really clear about what it would mean to feel supported. How would that manifest? Help people help you by asking for specific things. Sometimes delegating one small task creates an exponential amount of space for another. Consider asking for help a daily practice: “What can I ask someone to do for me today?”

5. Self-Care: Put your own oxygen mask on first.

Your own needs rank high on the hierarchy of needs. Do not pretend otherwise or they will come out sideways. If you are a multi-tasker, your energy output is enormous. You must find ways to fill up your own tank. This is your responsibility; no one will do it for you.

Make time for self-care—a warm bath at the end of the day, a yoga class, dinner with friends—only you know what you need to feel nurtured. Make it happen so you can continue to be of service to others.Self-care

A 2-Minute Exercise That Will Change Your Life & Help You Lose Weight

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Did you know that you can visualize your way to health? Even success?

 

I know that may sound woo-woo, but hang on.

 

For sure, getting the health you want requires making conscientious choices—but once you know how, that stuff becomes second nature and doesn’t feel like work. It just becomes a way of life.

 

Too often though, women don’t even get started, or they quit before they’ve gotten very far, because they don’t believe that they can have the body or health they desire.

 

Here are some of the common statements I hear when patients first come to me:

 

  • I’m so fat. I can never stick to a diet.
  • I just don’t have the time to exercise.
  • My mom and grandmother were overweight, so even if I wanted to lose weight, I doubt that I could.

 

Sound familiar?

 

These defeatist thoughts are uber-common and set us up to fail. The trickiest part of changing health is changing our beliefs. But once we do, the changes we make last forever.

Make SHIfT happen: Visualize success!

Most of us were taught that health was either something we had or didn’t have—maybe it’s just in our genes, for example—and we certainly weren’t taught it’s something we can control! We tend to think negatively about our bodies and our ability to make shift happen. We hand our health over to experts. We focus on the obstacles. And we get STUCK. Because what happens in our mind has a tremendous influence over what happens in our body!

But have you ever considered that there is another way to think about—and create—health?

Athletes do this all the time: they visualize their success down to the specific details of their moves on the court or field, to hearing their team’s song on the victor’s stand.

  • Bjorn Borg, the 1970s world champion tennis player talked about mastering the perfect serve by visualizing it happening before he even tossed the ball into the air.
  • Heavyweight champion Muhammad Ali was thought to be so successful because he emphasized his mental agility over his substantial physical prowess, using affirmations, visualization, mental rehearsal, and self-confirmation.
  • Jack Nicklaus, world champion golfer, said, “I never hit a shot, not even in practice, without having a very sharp in-focus picture of it in my head.”

And it’s not just the big boys who’ve got this mastered!

  • Mary Lou Retton, the first American to win the all-around gold medal in the Olympic Games said in an interview with TimeMagazine that on the night before the finals in women’s gymnastics, she lay in bed mentally rehearsing her performance.
  • Gabby Douglas, another Olympic Gold-winning gymnast, also used this tool. “I visualized the floor set I wanted to do, and then I went out and hit the best floor routine of my life. It proved to me just how powerful my mind can be.”The Secret Sauce: See your body and health goals as a fait accompli.

    Getting healthy requires that that we believe in ourselves, get our beliefs unstuck, and create new thought patterns that lead to sustainable practices. We do this by visualizing our success, just like world-class athletes.

    Here’s what I teach my patients: Getting healthy requires us to actually see ourselves as healthy (or fit or slimmer or sleeping better or fill-in-the-blank) before we even get there. We have to think ourselves well! It’s a form of emotional fitness and mental retraining. So, for example, if your goal is to lose weight for a wedding this summer, here’s what you’d do:

    • Imagine yourself feeling fit and sexy, wearing that perfect-sized peach silk dress, your Michelle Obama “guns” ablazing, to your BFFs upcoming summer wedding—before you even start to change your eating habits.
    • Visualize taking that dream trip of yours, completely headache-free, because you made the lifestyle changes necessary to free yourself up from those nasty stressors that were triggering them, you started drinking more water, and getting more sleep.
    • Revel in the image of standing on top of that mountain with your arms in the air in a victory dance because you had the energy to make that climb—because you got your blood sugar balanced, lost 20 pounds, and started a great exercise plan with a fantastic trainer.
    • Imagine that your period practically sneaked up on you because it was so PMS-less and cramp-free that you didn’t even notice it coming because you quit drinking so much coffee and added green veggies and flax seeds to your daily diet!

    If you believe you can get to your health goals, you’re more likely to do the things that get you healthy, such as making quality food choices, getting regular exercise, going to sleep at a healthy hour, surrounding yourself with people who make you happy, even changing to a healthier job environment that doesn’t give you headaches!

    Ok, maybe right now you don’t. Because you’ve been practicing the other way of thinking your whole life. It’s all you were ever taught. But I am here to tell you that I believe in you. Because I see women turn it around all the time.

    It takes practice and determination to go at it over and over until the new skill is second nature. Sure, there will be some times that you don’t stick the landing. But you just get out there and try again.

    Visualizing Your Goal…and Making It STICK

    The first time you do this, give yourself up to 20 minutes to really play with the dream you want to create. After that, you can do this practice in two minutes max each day and get a lifetime of benefit!

    Here are the steps to translate your goals into real and lasting health success:

    1. Find a quiet, comfortable place to relax for 20 minutes. Have a notebook and pen in hand, or your fave electronic writing device. Make sure you’ve blocked out all distractions—cell phone, kids, partner, e-mail. You want to focus.

    2. Close your eyes and take four deep breaths—inhale deeply, exhale deeply.

    3. Now identify the goal you want to create. Get really detailed and specific about it—imagine the sensation you feel having accomplished your goal, imagine your surroundings. Think about what you’re wearing, what you see, what you smell, how your friends and loved ones respond to the changes you’ve made. Imagine that it’s already happening.

    4. Imagine that you’re incredibly proud of yourself. You are positively glowing!

    5. Capture this image in your mind’s eye. (Write it all down, too, so you don’t forget!)

    6. End your session with a personal “huddle.”

    7. Return to it for several minutes every day.

    Reinforce your new practice with the following affirmations:

    • I am amazing.
    • I can do anything.
    • I am prepared to succeed.

    Make sure to call this image up when making specific health choices, for example, when deciding between that muffin or veggie sticks and hummus, or when you’re torn between going for a quick run or getting glued to Facebook.

    And what I said earlier about having a pit crew for accountability really makes a difference. All successful athletes have coaches (and often teams) who believe in their success and hold them accountable to their goals.

    Don’t hesitate to rely heavily on this tool when you’re making changes for your health. In fact, the more often you call up your goal, the closer it comes to being a reality!

    Booyah!

 

Are You Asking The Right Questions About Your Life?

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Questions are one of the most powerful forces on earth. Look at any creation and you’ll find a question—or more likely a whole bunch—behind it. From moving a mountain to going to Mars, from experiencing enlightenment to finding a cure for polio, questions form the path to creation. It’s how humans innovate and change.

This is because our brains love questions: it’s how we learn, forge new associations, and wire new neural connections. Now look at the creation of your life—how is it being shaped by the questions you ask? What questions are you consistently, perhaps repetitively, asking of yourself? Consider that these questions are shaping your brain, your habits, your actions, and, subsequently, your life.

Are they questions like:

  • What would I love to do next?
  • How can I get started today?
  • What is the next simplest thing to do?
  • What might I try next?
  • What am I most committed to?

Or do your questions sounds more like:

  • How do I know I’m doing enough?
  • What will people think?
  • Am I good enough?
  • Why bother?
  • What could I say that hasn’t already been said?
  • Why is this so hard?
  • Why does nothing ever go my way?

Are your questions pretending to be helpful while actually undermining you, as in: What if I succeed and that changes everything? or Why aren’t I doing more? or Why do I waste so much time?

These types of questions limit our imagination, causing us to settle for less than we really want without our knowing that more is possible. They reinforce our negativity bias by focusing on what’s wrong or could go wrong. They undermine our sense of creative agency, the truth that we always get to choose how we respond to life.

Most tragically, they isolate us through shame, convincing us we need to hide who we are from everyone, especially the people closest to us. We all ask unhelpful questions of ourselves. With a little bit of brain training, we can swap out our draining questions for more generative ones. Think a combo of Buddha and Picasso: mindful and creative, compassionate and disruptive.

Here’s how:

1. Start by noticing your current questions and make a list of your greatest hits.

You’ll find them easy to discern if you notice when your energy drops, your motivation drains away, and your mood goes south. Almost assuredly, there is a not-so-helpful question lurking behind your mood change. Capture it.

My favorites: Why is this taking so long? and Why is this so hard? Just becoming aware of your current questions will give you so much more choice and freedom.

2. Read over the questions you’ve gathered.

Ask yourself, What choices are these questions steering me toward? Skip the self-judgment, and instead, be curious. For example, when I ask myself, What choices does the question ‘Why is this so hard?’ steer me toward? I see the choice to sometimes give up a dream because I’m frustrated that I can’t make it happen sooner or with more ease. By seeing where your questions are steering you, you’ll know whether you want to keep asking them.

3. To change your questions, try dropping “why” questions.

They tend to lead you into the past, into an endless loop of trying to “figure it out.” This also focuses your mind on what’s wrong versus what’s possible. (Exceptions: “Why did the furnace break down?” or other practical matters.) Instead ask, What can I… orHow might I…?

For example:

What can I do to prepare for this interview? versus Why do I always get nervous and put off preparing?
How might I eat more veggies? versus Why is it so hard to eat right?

4. Relish the power of asking instead of the drive to find “the” answer.

Wanting “the” answer comes from your reptile brain’s desire to be safe. You have to mindfully cultivate uncertainty by telling yourself, It’s good to not know. Something richer and deeper will come as I stay open and curious. Stop confusing deciding with wisdom.

5. Dive deeper and ask from every angle.

Here are questions from a conversation with a couple wanting to retire but not having enough savings:

  • What if we invested in high-risk stocks for three years?
  • What if we moved to Mexico?
  • What if we sold everything and traveled with just backpacks?
  • What if we bought a bigger house and my mom moved in with us?
  • What if both our moms moved in with us?
  • What if we bought a compound with houses for the kids and the moms, with everybody helping?
  • What if we didn’t retire but retrained in new jobs?
  • What if we moved back to mom’s farm?

Keep flipping around, asking outrageous questions, especially ones that make you nervous or seem like a waste of time. In this case, the couple realized they didn’t want to retire so much as spend more time with family and do work that felt more meaningful.

6. Start your day with a mindful question.

I wrote a whole book of them, The Life Organizer. Examples include:

  • How do I want to feel today?
  • What would truly nourish me?
  • I can tempt more breathing space into my life by…

7. Step back when you feel lost, stuck, or frustrated and check in to hear what questions you are asking yourself.

Are they expansive? Creative? Shame and blame-free? How about simply useful? Imagine your brain is built on an operating system made of questions. That you are rewriting that operating system to work more effectively each and every time you ask questions that expand your possibility and help you remember you are good enough, you can trust yourself, and you can create more of what you want.

13 Resolutions, Solutions & Life Tweaks For 2014

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Resolutions. So many of us make ’em, break ’em and then throw in the towel until next year rolls around. For many it’s disheartening. Frankly, I think the idea of resolutions is somewhat outdated. Instead of making big, hard, doomed-to-fail resolutions, let’s break ’em down, call them “life tweaks,” and start making a few little adjustments every day. Look at what’s not working or dragging down your body or spirit and then start the break up process, like ending a bad relationship. If going cold turkey works better for you, then by all means do so.

And if you backslide, acknowledge it as a minor slip-up, not a major derailment, get back on track, and keep moving forward. For a little inspiration, here’s a round-up of the “life tweaks” that the amazing Be Well team and I will be working on in the months ahead:

1. Meditate more.

Meditation’s benefits are legion, and I try to do it every day, but I plan to consolidate my practice, and do 20 to 30 minutes of sitting meditation, first thing in the morning, right when I get out of bed. Sitting and focusing on my breath always leaves me feeling more calm, clear, centered and ready to take on the day.

2. Laugh more…

.…And not just by relying on Stephen Colbert and Jon Stewart, but by laughing more in everyday life. Laughter has tremendoushealing properties. Adding humor to our daily activities is fun, free and easy to do—so sign me up!

3. Eat more fat.

Yes, you read that right. I plan on giving good fats, like those from coconut oil, coconut cream, olive oil, nut butters, and butter from grass fed-cows, a much bigger role in my diet. And in 2014, I will encourage others to do the same. This is the year to help our culture let go of the idea that fat is bad for you and get folks to embrace good fats!

4. Monthly changes.

I know I can commit to making one change, one month at a time, so that’s my plan for 2014. Breaking it down into smaller, 30-day increments, making change feel less overwhelming. And besides, I love the idea of a fresh challenge every month! — Kerry Bajaj

5. Practicing “right speech.”

In Buddhism, there are some helpful tenets of right speech — that which is true, beneficial and pleasing to others. It’s so easy to stray from these, but it never feels good. For January, my first life tweak will be to practice right speech and check in on my progress every Sunday. As Kris Carr says, you have to pay attention to what you put in your mouth and what comes out of it! —Kerry Bajaj

6. Breaking up with sugar.

Instead of vague goals like “eat healthier” or “work out more,” my life tweaks need to be specific, so this January I’m letting go of sugar for the month – and possibly beyond. Pregnancy and breast-feeding brought on some serious sweet cravings, but now it’s time to say, “Hey, the sugar party is over,” and move on without it. Funny thing is, I’m really looking forward to not “needing” sugar anymore. — Katrine van Wyk

7. Learning to go with the flow.

So much stress and anxiety comes from the pressure I put on myself, so I’ve decided to let myself off the hook! I’ve learned that when I relax more and stop pushing so hard, life flows more easily. In 2014, I’ll be learning to take my foot off the gas more often and ask myself which of my “priorities” are really necessary, simplify accordingly, have more fun along the way and go with the flow. — Jenny Sansouci

8. Loosening caffeine’s grip.

I plan to rely on caffeine less, and hydrate more. Too much stimulation from caffeine, especially when I’m already tired, can really affect the adrenals and make me feel so much more fatigued, so it’s time to taper off. I’m going to crowd out caffeinated drinks and make lots more room for stabilizing, non-addicting, simply good-for-me H2O! — Jenny Sansouci

9. Greeting the day with energizing exercise.

Daily exercise always makes me feel terrific, but long days can make it tough to find time. In 2014, I’ll be waking up 20 minutes earlier to fit in some mini-trampoline jumping or living-room yoga on the days I know I won’t be getting to the gym. — Laura Kraber

10. Embracing the gift of sleep.

I love the quiet productivity and much-deserved downtime I get from staying up late, but boy, do I hate feeling groggy the next day. So my life tweak for 2014 is more of a sleep tweak: I am committing to getting 8 hours of sleep every nig

11. Sharing the love.

Living in New York City with a baby, this year I have experienced so many beautiful acts of generosity and kindness. They’ve inspired me so much so that for 2014, I’m making it my practice to be mindful of reflecting generosity back to others. Connecting with others through kind words or deeds that go above and beyond is not just nice for them, it also sows the seeds of profound happiness in our own lives, and so everybody wins. — Jennifer Mielke

12. Taking the time to slow down.

They say less is more, so in 2014, that’s exactly what I will be doing. Over the past few months, I’ve been spreading myself too thin, caring for my newborn and my toddler, getting back into shape after childbirth, and trying to focus on my business. Time to shake things up a little, so this year, I will be learning to prioritize more and slow down. — Courtney Blatt

13. Making time for my physical health.

Exercise is a big part of my life. It makes me feel better both physically and mentally. Since I have limited time, I tend to fall into the rut of same exercise routines. This year, I’m going to set some new goals – like competing in my first triathlon! Not only will it keep me motivated, it will keep me moving in different ways. — Courtney Blatt

How To Feel More Attracted to Your Partner

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It’s a bit of a taboo subject in our culture: attraction, or lack thereof. We’re taught that you’re either attracted to a romantic partner or not, and there are no gradations in between. We also place great value on physical attraction and use it as a barometer for whether or not we should continue to pursue a relationship. Even if the attraction was there initially but ultimately fades, we culturally support someone leaving a relationship for that reason. “I just wasn’t attracted to her anymore,” and the audience nods.

I can even hear the potential backlash to the title of this article: If you have to work to feel more attraction, obviously you’re in the wrong relationship!

I champion a vastly different mindset: not only can we grow attraction, but if a solid and loving relationship is going to withstand the test of time, we must learn to see beyond the superficial criteria of attraction by which we’re culturally conditioned to view others (and ourselves).

Let’s say you meet someone and the primary determinant for whether or not you feel attracted to that person is physical appearance. What happens when, 10 or 30 years down the road, their physical appearance is altered by time and life (as it inevitably will be): skin wrinkles, hair thins and grays, body parts pooch and muscles sag? If you haven’t cultivated real attraction for your partner, you’ll panic and your relationship will probably suffer immensely and, possibly, irreparably.

So if real attraction isn’t just about physical appearance, what is it?

Real attraction is when you see your partner’s essence—who he or she is in her heart—instead of only focusing on externals. It’s heart-work at the deepest level. It’s seeing beyond the bald spot or the big nose or the income or degrees, and swimming in the delicious, sparkling river of your partner’s goodness, her kindness, his complete devotion to loving you and supporting you.

And there’s good news for those who struggle to feel more attracted to their loving, devoted, well-matched significant other. For those who don’t want to walk away from their best friend and fantastic life partner just because they don’t swoon every time she or he walks in the room: Real attraction, like real love, is a skill that can be grown. In fact, there are actual Love Laws and Loving Actions that, when understood and practiced, lead to increased love and attraction for your partner.

Here are a few of the love laws and loving actions:

1. Redefine attraction.

When you to learn to see essence instead of only externals and understand that attraction is much more than surface features, you see that real attraction is a magnetic force that draws you to your partner’s intrinsic, inviolable qualities. You can then cultivate this real magnetism through loving actions like connecting to gratitude and expressing appreciation.

2. Notice and name your fear walls.

We all fear intimacy to different degrees. We fear losing ourselves, losing other, or losing control. When someone comes too close, even if it’s someone we deeply love, it’s natural for fear walls to erect around our hearts to protect us from the risk of suffering these losses. When you bring compassion and attention to these fear walls, they start to soften, and you can then make a choice to either indulge the fear wall, thereby fueling its fire, or choose to act lovingly by moving toward your partner.

When we move toward our deeper value—to share a loving connection with our partner—as opposed to giving in to the feeling of the moment, we soften the fear walls and are able to create the relationship we truly desire. Identifying the fear wall and the sometimes subtle ways it can manifest—like lack of attraction or irritation—is an essential first step.

3. Love yourself.

We often hear that it’s not possible to truly love another until you learn to love yourself. I believe that there is truth to this statement, but I also believe that in actively loving another (using the Love Laws and Loving Actions I’ve enumerated above) you also fill your well of self-love. Still, it’s essential to dismantle the unloving beliefs you hold about yourself that limit your ability to take loving action on your own behalf. As you love yourself and see yourself as you really are—basing your self-worth on your own intrinsic, inviolable qualities that have nothing to do with externals—your love for your partner naturally grows.

This work isn’t always easy as it flies in the face of everything we’ve been conditioned to believe in our highly image-based culture. It requires you not only to re-learn the way you see and judge others but also how you’ve allowed feelings to determine your actions and perhaps most importantly, the way you see and judge yourself.

When you learn the nuts and bolts behind the science of love, your relationship—and your entire life—will change in ways you can only imagine.

Flowers and Food

INSIGHT:

Beyond the beauty of flowers is its life giving nourishment. Nearly one third of the food we eat is created from some kind of flower.

QUOTE:

“Nobody sees a flower – really – it is so small it takes time – we haven’t time – and to see takes time, like to have a friend takes time.” –Georgia O’Keeffe

THOUGHT:

I give thanks for the beauty of nature, which perpetuates my existence.